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- Issue #371: The 3 Pillars of Happiness
Good morning. It’s Friday, July 26th.
In today’s email:
Learn: The Happiness Formula
Try: Finding Joy
Cook: Strawberry Coconut No-Bake Energy Balls
Listen: Good Inside Podcast
In the News: Hangxiety
Brain Games: Kyudoku
Favorite List
Connections (NYT) - among all the new brain games out there, this one has become my favorite. It’s now part of my daily routine to find the four categories of four words each from a random list of 16 words.
DuckTrap Salmon - there’s a big difference between Atlantic farmed salmon and wild caught salmon from Alaska. This is the latter and it’s my go-to smoked salmon just about any morning. (Whole Foods)
The Olympics - ignore the corruption, ignore the outrageous costs for the host city, and just admire the feats of the best athletes in the world. Some don’t miss events - Lebron & Company, Katie Ledecky - trying to win more gold medals than any women in history, Harvard grad Gabby Thomas sprinting in the 200m - plus all the other stars we don’t know…yet.
Stat of the Day
The impact our genetics has on our happiness. There’s some new research suggesting it might not be this high, but it’s still there. Some genes that matter - 5-HTTLPR (regulates serotonin), CNR1, and MAOA. The key is what we do with the other 50%. (source)
Learn
The Happiness Formula
Are you happy?
It’s not an easy question. It’s even more challenging if we don’t really know what happiness is or what it really means.
Before you attempt to answer that question for yourself, we should talk about what it means to be happy.
Arthur Brooks has become the de facto “happiness guru.” He started on this journey because he didn’t think he was actually happy - so what should we know and what should we do?
What Happiness is NOT
First - it’s not about pure pleasure. Those dopamine hits we get are great, but fleeting - and not what makes us truly happy.
Second - happiness isn’t a destination. This is “arrival fallacy.” We all have those thoughts - life will be better when (fill in the gap - lose 10 lbs, get that next promotion, get the kids out of diapers, achieve your retirement savings goal, etc.). But it doesn’t work out the way we think - we just adjust to the new normal and still have the same feelings.
Third - happiness isn’t always “feeling good.” There’s no such thing as “bad” feelings. Negative emotions like fear, anger, sadness are what keep us alive and striving for more in life.
In other words - feelings are just information. It’s what we do with this information that matters.
The Happiness Formula
According to Brooks, this is what makes up happiness:
It’s a lot to unpack - let’s focus on Enjoyment first.
It’s actually part of the transition we go through as we shift from our 20’s into 30’s and beyond.
Life used to be free of all responsibilities. After work was time for drinks out with friends. Weekends were for parties, trips, bbq’s - whatever was on the social calendar.
But now evenings are shuttling kids around, deciding who cooks or orders dinner, managing bedtime routines. Even if kids aren’t around - we’re still not living that crazy life we used to.
It can feel a little stale, a little boring. Maybe we don’t feel we’re as happy as we used to be and maybe that’s why we wish we were young again.
But maybe we just need to shift our thinking.
Think about the word “enjoyment.” Not the most exciting word - it’s not what you’d put out there to get people to a party.
And it’s true, sometimes the “enjoyable” thing doesn’t give us as big a hit of dopamine as if we were just seeking as much pleasure as we could get.
There might be a higher “high” scrolling social media than playing a board game with the kids. Our kids might get more pleasure locked up in their room playing video games than being stuck playing with mom and dad.
But it’s not just about the “high” - it’s about the sustaining nature of the happiness.
Enjoyment is when we have pleasure while being with other people and making a memory.
If it’s addictive and brings pleasure, don’t do it alone.
Maybe we’re already living an enjoyable life that we’re mistaking for boring. Or maybe we need to prioritize bringing more joy into our daily life.
Either way - seeking out pure pleasure shouldn’t be the goal.
Connecting with people you want to be around, making memories with them (no matter what it is you’re actually doing) - that’s what life’s all about.
Try
Finding Joy
For the next week, every day write down one enjoyable experience that you had while with other people.
Can you get to 7 memories this week?
Thrive25 Partner Spotlight
TMAC is kicking off a 15-day Free Yoga for Athletes challenge! Whether you're a seasoned athlete or just starting out, this challenge is designed to improve your flexibility, strength, and balance.
Don’t take my word for it - here’s what Jason Wachob, CEO of mindbodygreen says, “If you want to get in the best shape of your life, in the privacy of your own home, then there is no better place to start than TMAC.”
Take the first step towards a fitter, more balanced you! Join the FREE 15-day Yoga for Athletes challenge by clicking HERE!
Listen
Good Inside Podcast
Take a listen to Arthur Brooks with host Dr. Becky Kennedy, a clinical psychologist, with the goal of helping us all raise resilient kids. They’re conversation is for everyone (even non-parents) about happiness - but it also touches on why we shouldn’t be helicopter parents (or snowplows) and that it’s dangerous to wish our kids to always be happy.
Cook
Strawberry Coconut No-Bake Energy Balls
These no-bake energy balls provide instant energy with complex carbs and performance fats, plus protein for recovery - all without heating up your kitchen. Ready in 40 minutes, they're perfect pre- or post-workout snacks. Each ball has 127 calories, 9g carbs, 8g fat, and 6g protein. Each ingredient brings health benefits to the table too - whether it be antioxidants, healthy fats, fiber, collagen, vitamins C & E or protein.
These energy balls are a convenient and nutritious snack to fuel your day, whether you’re gearing up for a workout or recovering from one. Try them now for a quick and healthy energy boost!
In the News
Our Cells on Western Diets: Too much insulin from refined grains and sugary foods speeds up cellular aging. Learn how a ketogenic diet and fasting can promote healthier, longer living. (Big Think)
How Bad is Air Pollution: Toxic air kills over 600,000 children annually. Despite this, it's rarely listed as a cause of death. Learn the heartbreaking story of Ella Roberta, and her mother’s fight to take on the UK’s toxic air. Key ingredients for cleaner air: advocacy, awareness, and action. (WIRED)
Welcome to Hangxiety: Anxiety, guilt, and irritability are common hangover symptoms. Learn how to manage and prevent hangxiety with self-compassion, hydration, and relaxation techniques. (Health.com)
Brain Games
Kyudoku
It’s Kyudoku time! A 6x6 grid where you need to use logic to find nine unique numbers (1 to 9) so that each row and column has a sum of 9 or less. Sudoku, but with more distractions. The 1 highlighted in yellow is given.
Here’s a little help to get started. Because we know 1 is given, we can’t use 1 again (gray boxes) and we can also eliminate any numbers that would make the sum of the row or column with the given 1 more than 9 (blue boxes) . Wait, no blue boxes - this is going to be tough!
Credit: Brainzilla
** For answer, scroll to the bottom of the email
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Thanks for another great week!
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Brain Games Answer
Here’s the answer. In this grid, 9 and 5 are pretty straightforward - there’s only one of each! Then, you’ll notice a relationship between 6-7-8, figure this out and you’re home free. How did you solve it?
We’re 40-something dads that felt our bodies and minds start to slow down and we’re not ready for that. We found too much information on every subject. So we started Thrive25 to transform what we’ve learned into something useful for the rest of us to spend just 5 min a day to optimize our health & longevity.
This newsletter is for you and we truly value your feedback. Never hesitate to reach out to us at [email protected].
To health!